Sep 26, 2009
I feel as though I subconsciously needed to take a little break from writing about Molly, and updating the blog, because it was so unbelievably emotional and somewhat painful for me to continue to find the words to describe our thoughts and feelings. Nothing dramatic has changed since the beginning of the month. Meg and I have our good moments, and we have days in which we have to summon every bit of our strength and courage just to get out of bed in the morning to face another day without Molly. Today has been a good day….
We recently turned Molly’s Fund into an official 501(c) non-profit. We have a board of directors, a lawyer who is working on navigating through the red tape for us, and we’ve been using the money from Molly’s Fund to help other families. This has helped in our healing process – to focus on helping other folks – and we have some great events that are in the planning stages in which we will not only be able to help other families but to also drive some funds towards childhood cancer research. The game is on….
Meg and I are going to see The Makaha Sons tonight at the Exeter/Stratham Cooperative Middle School, and the proceeds from this event will benefit a few local charities as well as the Molly Fund. We are double dating with Dean and Karen Hagar and we’re looking forward to seeing a lot of our gang there tonight.
It might rain tomorrow, which is a bummer, because we have a big ol’ team lined up to pull some “Miles for Molly” in the New Castle Kid’s PMC ride tomorrow. Please check out the link:
If anyone wants to join us, everyone is certainly welcome, and you can register on the Team Page or just meet us at the New Castle Commons tomorrow morning at 8:00am. A little rain is no big deal and we’re excited to have some fun. Kieran told me this morning that he wants to ride his scooter, not his bike, tomorrow. Okay, dude…..
Meg and I want to thank Jeff, and the crew from Gus’ Bike Shop in No.Hampton, for hosting the Molly ride a few weeks ago. Chuck is going to post some photos of the riders that participated in this event and they raised a good chuck of money for the Fund. Jeff, you’re so awesome and we truly appreciate the support. Thank you, brother!
I don’t know if I should be dropping this “bomb” so soon, but we have a crazy hockey event that is going to happen on February 14th 2010. Boston Bruins Alumni vs. The Surfer’s!!!!!! INSANE!!!! Kenny Linseman and Rick Middleton, Bruin legends, are leading the charge and this event is going to monumental. Since having retired from the NHL, Kenny Linseman has transformed himself into one of the most hardcore surfers that I know. Kenny grabbed me a few months ago and mentioned that he wanted the Bruins Alumni to get involved with a Molly Fund event, so it’s going to happen on Valentines Day. We had a meeting last week, and I nominated Dave Cropper and Phil Carey as team captains for The Surfer’s because those two guys are perfect for the job. If you’re interested in playing for The Surfer’s, then please stay tuned for more details in the coming weeks/months. Players will be responsible for a little nitty gritty fund raising, so FYI…..
Kieran is back in school, Pre-K at MFS, and he’s doing well. Meg and I have him slotted in a grief counseling group, and Kieran is actually excited to talk to other little boys and girls who may have lost a sibling. He is grieving in his own little “4 year old” way, and Meg and I are spending a lot of time with him and talking about Molly. The other day Kieran and I were in Molly’s room and we were sprawled on her bed. After we talked a little bit about how sad we both were that Molly died, Kieran was silent for a moment and then he said, “I love you, Molly.” The way that Kieran said those words felt like he was talking to her as if she was with us in the room. I wonder…..
The rumors are true. Since turning “39″ last week, I decided that it was time to start checking off some more boxes on my “Bucket List.” I am going to bull riding school in TX. in April and I’m lookin’ for some “pardners.” Don’t be dissin’ my boots and spurs! Who’s in?
I love you, Molly.
Sep 24, 2009
This is a little belated, but we need to thank the guys at Lucky Signs for surprising us with a batch of gold Molly stickers they made for us and donated. These guys are the best, doing great work and keeping the support coming. Since we have more stickers, it would be a great time to donate to get one. Check the stickers out here.
Sep 12, 2009
I cry everyday. Meg does as well, and sometimes we cry together while we hold onto each other with all of our might. Molly’s death is not getting any less painful to deal with, now that it’s been two months, and we find ourselves crying just as much as we did 42 days ago……
I listen to Molly’s voice every single day – sometimes I listen to her 10 times a day. Many years ago, when I was traveling constantly, Molly would leave me messages on my cell phone. For some reason, I was smart enough to save one of her messages and I get to hear her sweet voice whenever I feel the urge. There are days when I “feel the urge” once a day, and there are times when I listen to her voice 20 times a day. Just hearing Molly’s voice reminds me of just how much I love her, and I imagine her beside me….I glance over and begin to cry. I miss Molly so much.
It is easy to feel strong when you’re surrounded by a lot of friends. It is the quiet time that’s painful. I have found myself waking up, in the middle of the night, and walking into Molly’s room. I climb into her bed, hoping to get a sense of Molly – to smell Molly – to feel Molly. It has been two months since Molly has died and it only feels like yesterday. We still cry. We’re still so very sad, and we still have to pray for the courage to get out out of bed each day. I love you, Molly. Mommy and I love you and we miss you so much…